6.
“Falling in love with my neurodivergence. I was diagnosed around then, and I just completely fell into the cult of AuDHD stuff. Before then, I had actually developed all these great coping skills, but in the cult, you don’t do any of those things. You ask for accommodations, do things your own way, and fuck the rest of the world. What I didn’t realize is that the world would be like: ‘Well then, fuck you, too.’ I had to work so hard to get back on track to be able to do the things I needed to do to have the things I wanted: a job I liked and did well at, grad school, getting along with neurotypical people, paying my bills, not living in a slovenly mess, etc.”
“Now I just accept that some things are a lot easier for me than for neurotypical people, and some things are a lot harder. So I put more energy into the hard things and enjoy doing the easier things.”
“This comment is so brilliant.
I’m also diagnosed with AuDHD only in the last few years at middle age.
There’s definitely too much going on in the whole ‘don’t mask, be yourself, get accommodations’ thing. It’s gone too far and is making people give up and act helpless.
I guess I kind of see it like I’d see a weak muscle. I’ll probably always struggle with it, but I want to keep it strong enough to live a successful life. I don’t want my autism to strip me of opportunities by being complacent and letting it take over my life.
Like, for example, executive dysfunction is a bitch, and I do allow myself some ‘dysregulation days’ — perhaps one day a week or two evenings a week where I can do whatever my brain fancies, even if that’s sitting around not doing much. But other days I’m definitely going to battle it and be more firm with myself, ‘No, you need to do one of your hobbies, you need to study,’ because if I don’t fight it, then my life will become me just flopped on the couch, and that is very dull.
Like, sometimes I need to mask. I’ll never like crowds, I hate crowds, but you better believe I’m going to fight that so I can enjoy concerts and conventions.”
